Tuesday, June 28, 2011

plus one

If you've seen us around lately - and we both have huge, stupid grins on our faces... it's because we're pregnant!! FINALLY!!

We've been trying for over a year... and it's been one of the most difficult trials I've ever had to go through.  I never in a million years thought I would be a person who would have fertility issues... I suppose no one ever thinks that.  But have you seen both of our families?! Kids running everywhere ;)  I didn't think we would be the ones to have problems. I know some people go much longer without getting pregnant - and I'm so grateful we didn't have to wait YEARS.  But - that blessed day has arrived where all my wishes are coming true!! My super amazing doctor - Dr. Ott - diagnosed me with PCOS in January.  I kind of figured that was what what going on in the ol uterus, because I had literally every single symptom.  Dr. Ott thinks that my PCOS was an after effect of birth control -  most women get it - mine just lasted longer than usual.  They put me on fertility medication - but nothing was working.  Finally, in June they told me that I had finally ovulated!  That's probably only happened 2 or 3 times in the last year - so it was a big deal!  My doctor and his team told me that getting pregnant on your first round of Clomid is pretty rare - well you can suck it, infertility! We got pregnant on our first round of Clomid! Hooray!

For real - I cried for about two days :D our of pure joy!!  I'm not a very emotional person.  So the past year has been, without a doubt, the most tear filled year of my life.  Every negative pregnancy test, every doctor visit, every pregnancy announcement, every baby born...  When I think back on it, it's not that I was jealous, or angry, or spiteful towards all the pregnant ladies popping up - it just made me feel like such a failure.  Like there was something so wrong with me that I wasn't ever going to get to be a mother.  It broke my heart. And it seems like, as soon as I found out we had problems, every person and their dog was pregnant.  Yeah, it's been a hard year :) But worth it!  I had taken a pregnancy test 4 days before my missed period, and it was negative.  {I'm a nervous nancy - so I couldn't wait for the first day of my missed period :)} So I was pretty sure we were going to have to wait til next month and go on another round of Clomid.  But, My mom and I went to pick up our Bountiful Baskets the morning I found out, and I saw a pregnant lady there and I got the strongest feeling I should pee on that stick again :)  *backstory time*  I've been living in the mindset that I just can't think about children and pregnancy until it happened to me.  It was too depressing and consumed my life for a while. So, when I saw the negative pregnancy test I just pushed it out of my mind *backstory over ;)*  But, that day picking up our baskets - I got that feeling one can't ignore.  So, I peed - and voila! Two lines! I almost fainted.  I'd taken probably 4 or 5 boxes - BOXES - of pregnancy tests in the last year - all negative.  So it hit me like a ton of bricks.  I'm gonna get real religious on you, so if you can't handle it, feel free to skip to the next paragraph.  I immediately dropped to me knees - in my bathroom - and prayed my little heart out.  I've never thanked the Lord so vehemently.  I was crying uncontrollably (you know - the kind where you're pretty much wailing into the air and snotting everywhere?) and trying the get my thanks out of my mouth fast enough to let my Heavenly Father know how much this new little life meant to me.  Thanks for answering our many, many prayers to start a family.  Thanks for letting me take care of one of your special souls.  I'll guard this little one with my life in every way possible. You get the gist :D p.s I have a picture of the 4 tests I took that are all positive - but I thought that would be a little weird - showing you my pee soaked preggers tests all up close a personal ;) sorry! haha

I text Ammon because I knew he was a work and wouldn't be able to answer a phone call.  I said "Go to the bathroom and call me.  It's extremely urgent."  I knew he would think it was something to do with our house - which we signed papers for 2 days later - go figure :D. I text him again a few minutes later and said "CALL ME! Incredibly urgent! can't wait!!"  So, he called me from one of his work phones. I said hello and he said "what's going on. What's wrong with the house?"  I started bawling, again, and said "I'm Pregnant!" he was totally stunned - because I'd told him I got a negative test :D he's adorable. After a quick explanation, all he could say was "wow. I've got tingles and jingles!" inside joke :D In hindsight, I probably could have done something all cute - since the next day was Father's Day - I'm still kicking myself on that one :D  the joy was just too much to hold in - so I had to tell him! I was about to explode :D

This is how I told my brothers :) I miss this kid so much! I'm so sad he won't be here to see his first niece or nephew born - so this helped him feel included a little bit :D 

I'm not very far along - only 6 weeks.  But - I was passing a kidney stone TODAY (go figure right?) so we went to the doctor to check it out via ultrasound - and they said everything with baby looks good!!  So, I couldn't wait til I was 12 weeks to blab like I was planning :D 

but - after the longest sob story you've ever heard in your life - YAY!! We're FINALLY going to be parents!! I've waited for this day since like the third week of our marriage :D I can't wait!  You'll be seeing a lot more posts from me - with lots of exclamation points  :D  Hooray!!!!!!!!!!!!!