Saturday, May 3, 2014

A Mother's Heart

I saw something today that I just can't let go.  I posted about it on Facebook - which I love because all of the comments make me realize I'm not crazy.  Ammon and I were watching youtube in the background while we were both reading, and while it was cycling through random videos - it stopped on one called "jerk dad kicks his 6 year old son off a halfpipe"

Usually I would immediately change it, because becoming a mother has softened my heart to almost mush.  I can't watch anything that remotely involves children being hurt, or I'll end up crying for days.  The video was a of a tiny boy on top of a ten foot high half pipe.  He had a tiny skateboard and a helmet, shoulder and knee pads.  The dad was smoking a cigarette and waiting, impatiently, for his son to drop in the halfpipe.  I guess he's been waiting too long because he looked flustered and kicked his son in the butt so he fell down into the pipe.  He landed right on his little bum and in the video you can hear him crying and saying "ouch!" in just the most heartbreaking voice ever.

In my eyes - I don't see a stranger kicking his child in the most demeaning way.  I see my Cruz getting kicked by someone.  I see my sweet angel Cruz getting donkey kicked in the bum and falling 8 feet flat on his rear end.  I hear my Cruz saying "OUCH!".  I want to rush to help him.  I want to pick him up and tell him "I'm going to punch that douche in the face for kicking you.  I'm going to make this feel better and you will be avenged!"  Okay, I would never say "You will be avenged!" I real life.  But my mama bear instincts feel that way!

After I was over the shock and awe that a father actually did that to his child, I think "Who is filming this?!" You can hear two women in the background chatting about something stupid.  Is one of those women his mother?  How could you let someone treat your child like that?!  How could you watch, let alone FILM, this awful thing happening to your son?

Outraged, I logged into my youtube account to see if anyone set this idiot strait via the comments.  I was in for a huge shock.  The first comment says something like "Glad you pushed him in! He looks like he needs to toughen up! Parenting done right!"

OPEN MOUTHED SHOCK

Who are these people? How can ANYONE be that calloused towards a CHILD?! And six years old? That is first grade.  That is still a baby to me!  I was physically sick. My stomach in knots.  Why can't I let this go?  Why is this eating away at my heart?

I searched more.  I found a video from the local news station saying that this was being investigated.  FINALLY! A small relief.

Then I remembered a friend of mine posting a video of a mother beating her infant baby with a pillow and smacking it across the face because it wouldn't stop crying.  I'm not exaggerating when I say that video has haunted my dreams.  This baby was younger than Parks.  So, through my eyes - I don't see a tiny Latino baby, I see my perfect Parks being beaten for no reason.  I see Parks reaching out to his mama only be smacked upside the head.  I see an evil woman hurting MY child.  I never understood why men and women were so different.  Why women seemed to have a special something inside them that could move mountains and part seas to help a child.  But I do now.  I know that nothing in this world would stop me from protecting my children.  I would gladly die for them, with a smile.  I would do ANYTHING, and I do mean anything, for them.  Not only for MY children, but for any child! Because that child is someone's Cruz or someone's Parks.  That child is loved so much by someone, and if something happened to them - it would rip them apart like it would me if it were my child.

Our world scares me.  Thank the Lord for the gospel and the church.  We need all the protection we can get!  And if my precious, amazing, perfect children ever read this, know one thing: Your mom loved you more than you can even comprehend.  Your mom will burn the world down before she lets something happen to you.  Your mom will do, literally, anything for you.  Because your mom loves you more than this life and all the lives hereafter.  The end :)